Yep, Please do that. Each and every corner of it so that not only I but others who are new to music creation in DAWs can learn from it :) I will improve the mix step by step. Give whatever possible ideas you can, coming to vocals...I think it's a later thing, but I may do some vocals too. It's about our friendship with Jesus Christ. The mood is very pleasant and ambient. And sorry for last night. I fell asleep it was 2'clk AM. So couldn't resist it.
well, ground up lets tart with composition.... there's a developed melodic theme that's simple and memorable but maybe not particularly effective as the opening phrase sounds A LOT like a specific children's song (daddy finger daddy finger where are you) so having that reference built into its DNA already skews the listener's emotional response away from your intent as a composer... next there is little to no variation in the melody, making it a rather intricate form of a repetitive motif called an ostinato. The thing about an ostinato is that its strongest when you repeat it continuously over constantly shifting harmonies with little-to-no variation and you did not do that. The Ostinato never varies and the chord changes just repet interminably. As a result the mood of the piece never changes and it gets old in a couple bars because the arrangement has all the hallmarks of steady state music (not a bad thing, but in this instance its not going to hold anyone's attention, especially not the audience you're aiming to communicate with). As an Indian you may wish to reference indian classical music for an idea of how this 'spiritual' repetitive drone thing is usually handled to draw a listener in and keep their attention with small additions and subtle changes in rhythmic, melodic and harmonic motifs that slowly build (techno and acid house tend to use this approach too, interestingly enough, but a lot of 20th century western 'minimalist' and '12tone' composers also went this route - check out phillip glass, john cage etc to ehar it done in western music with real aplomb). Your composition fails to progress in any discernable way nor is ti truly an ambient piece in the Brian Eno tradition, favoring that melodic hook over an otherworlds harmonic soundscape that I can just completely ignore. Its most certainly a SONG that hasn't been developed in the writing phase to exploit the melodic idea to the full.
nuts and bolts arrangement issues.... zero dynamic changes, a lot of arrangement elements being played in the same register too. The only real rhythmic info is from the percussion part which is singularly sparse and repetitive to the point that I forgot it was there after 15 seconds... again, not interesting, surprising and exciting nor is it and ambient soundscape that sits in the background subtley influencing my state of mind
so right there you probably want to do less or more with this and in so doing really define what kinda relationship (broadly) the listener is going to have with the music, that's for you to decide as its creator... I think over all your composition and arrangement suffer from an acute lack of decision making in how you set about expressing the feeling you want to convey... although I dn't know a lot bout religious music other than Bach so maybe I just blew a ton of smoke up your ass.
In my opinion you could spend a lot more time develoipng the music and it will start to sound better unmixed when its really interesting to listen to to begin with
mix lacks an interesting stereo image and has no sense of front to back space... because of the arrangement a lot of information is cluttered in the mids and has not been separated with subtractive EQ... the use of reverb, particularly on the percussion is not spectacular (think aout shaping the reverb with EQ and dynamics processing to better suit the song, use a similar patch or the same patch for all sounds on a send etc etc, get a book man) I would also be looking to have less mud accumulating from all those synth pads between 300hz-800hz and maybe recenter the true midrange energy from the 1khz-4khz area up to a less fatiguing and more open sounding 4k-8k zone... things out front need more top details (10K-20K) to simulate closeness while sounds that you want to sound distant maybe don't need more reverb but rather need some gentle eq shelving above 10k to simulate the loss of high frequency info to friction when a sound source is further from our ear....
there's a lot to this that I enver have to explain to anyone and I am getting burned out on the mix..... just, try to make it sound good! and when you're not sure how try a google search or get a book and consult that for ideas.... and when standard ideas won't do? try these:
http://music.hyperreal.org/artists/brian_eno/oblique/oblique.html
